We cannot fix your Twin Flame situation, but we can help you to help yourself. And although we are living proof that our love story has the happiest ending imaginable, after the most trying time conceivable, your ending is up to you and your destiny.

Although we encourage Twin Flames to unite, the initial goal is to heal individually and become whole. That is why so many Twin Flames find themselves separated in the most dramatic of ways, including being rejected by their Other Half.

Welcome to the crash course in unconditional love. Your romantic connection is sparking immense personal transformation during these Ascension times. You see, the ultimate, romantic longing that you feel for your Beloved is leading you to finally embrace unconditional love in yourself – so that you can live from this higher place.

And you are not insane. This is not all in your head. Love is Real.

BUT WHAT IF I SUSPECT THAT I HAVE FOUND MY TWIN FLAME AND THEY DON’T RECIPROCATE WHAT I FEEL? The answer is to focus on you, your growth, and Self-Love. Whether this person is your Twin Flame or another kind of Ascension Soulmate does not matter. They have triggered intense spiritual growth for you that was contracted at the soul level, and that is all that is important for now.

SO IF YOUR BELOVED IS UNAWARE OF WHAT YOU HAVE, IS IN DENIAL OF YOUR CONNECTION, OR IS RUNNING AWAY FROM YOU, know that this is very common, albeit immensely excruciating, and we offer our deepest empathy – but you planned this experience because of something your soul ardently desires – to shed your own human conditioning that keeps you from unconditional love. That is how brave you are!

If your Beloved is “running,” understand that this is about you right now, and no one else. It’s not about blaming this other person, but rather embracing the growth they are pushing you towards. Your Beloved is asking you to love everyone as the Beloved. Most especially yourself. Their job is to motivate you to grow spiritually – rapidly, and it starts with you. 

You are being pushed to heal all of your insecurity and need for validation outside of yourself. You see, everything that you experience with your Beloved is mirroring your own limiting, internal beliefs. The limitations of love that you have carried inside are coming out to be healed. That is why your Beloved triggers your deepest pain – so that you can finally clear it. Your task is to see this and take responsibility for it. And to love yourself as much as you love them.

You asked for this ultimate test of faith so that you would finally trust and believe in yourself – so that you would summon your own strength inside and become forever empowered with love. This is what everything is waiting for, so put your energy towards becoming free, empowered, healthy, and whole in yourself. You deserve this more than anything.

And do this for yourself, not to be “perfect” for your Beloved. Remember, unconditional love does not mean having to be superhuman. It also doesn’t mean dishonoring yourself! So honor your beautiful being unconditionally always. Tap into your inner knowing for guidance and believe this above all else. Take each heart-led step to become complete in your own love. 

The situation you are in is exactly what you need to push yourself to grow and create a new, authentic life for yourself, by yourself. Your Beloved can’t do this for you. In fact, they will “run” so that you have to do it alone.

Know also that sometimes, the “chaser” is in fact the “runner.” They might use their Beloved’s lack of commitment or lack of awareness as an excuse to hide behind their own issues. As harsh as it sounds, many people hide behind blaming the other person, but they are only running away from themselves. They are looking for a solution externally that can only happen internally, thus delaying their own growth.

When you avoid all delay, all hiding and heal yourself, you will triumph. You will unite yourself, which is the most important union. You fulfill your beautiful self regardless of anything else, and this is a sacred goal fulfilled. It is everything.

Know that all genuine Twin Flame reunions are divinely timed and guided, and that they summon the patient faith of your soul. They ask you to believe what you already know in your heart of hearts – this Love. If you know that you are in a Twin Flame relationship, speak to your Twin from your heart and act when you feel called, with total authenticity. Know that you will humanly unite when you have both grown enough to feel worthy of your awe-inspiring, ecstasy-inducing Love.


Can you love your Other Half no matter what? They will shine if you do. As will you.

Your soul is calling you – loudly! – to heal every issue that plagues you. Yes, even when you are apart, and to know the greatest romantic experience available. If it is your destiny for this life, you will form the most heavenly partnership possible.

  • Know that everything is guided by your shared soul. See things from this elevated perspective, and live from this place of unconditional love and empathy. Any conditional judgment of your Twin will hold you back from reuniting. Any conditional judgment of prior partners will keep you stuck as well, so truly empathize with everyone and their challenges. Love yourself this way most of all.
  • If your Twin starts running, know that they are running away from their own growth. They aren’t ready to face the intense, painful and sublime process that a TF relationship requires. Have compassion for this, and face your own growth head on. This will inspire your Twin internally.
  • Your Twin Flame process is about feeling worthy of the greatest love imaginable. Know that you already are. Your growth means realizing this and stripping away illusions that say otherwise. There may be more to strip away than you think – especially your unconscious beliefs that are sabotaging you.
  • Your Twin is your perfect match, and in time you will both see how utterly perfect you are for each other. You are already permanently together and are simply going through a human experience of growth.
  • Push yourself through your process. Lingering in two worlds will prolong the suffering of a hellish limbo. Know that reunion can take time, but what you are accomplishing with each step of growth is incredible. Looking back, you will be amazed by how much you have achieved over a relatively short period.
  • Have conviction about this Love. Believe in your destiny. Yet build your dream life now, for yourself. Do not wait. Honor your true desires in every way right now by being honest, authentic, and open.
  • Purpose will guide you towards each other and give you passionate drive while separated. Let your higher purpose take over during phases of intense longing.

Know that you are so beautiful and brave. Have compassion for your human self as you face your healing. You will get through this.

And with the most joyful hearts, we can confirm that True Love is Real, and more blissfully satisfying than one can hold. We are living proof in blessed union that is more harmonious than we ever dreamed.

But what to do right now? FEEL THE LOVE

Actively FEEL the astronomical love that your Other Half ignites and anchor this love into reality. You can do this right away, any time, even while separated from each other. And even if your Twin is oblivious. Simply focus on the unconditional love, bring it fully into your being, and visualize it anchoring into your experience. This helps you to embody your full, spiritual power and to awaken divine love for others in our world.

You are remembering to love yourself unconditionally. This is what your incredible longing is guiding you towards. You are being asked to feel the same life-changing, unconditional love that you feel for your Twin for yourself. And then to remember that this love has always been within you, never outside.

Because you cannot unite with your Twin until you are able to handle the bliss of being together. And unless you love yourself, the bliss will be unbearable. You will feel that you don’t deserve it and come up with a million reasons why you can’t have it. But thankfully, every challenge in the way of your union is pushing you to remember self-love so that you can bask in ecstasy.

We know just how excruciating the whole process is. And it is sparked by your other half. But there are incredible reasons why.


REMEMBER THE MISSION! You are here to help our beautiful earth Ascend by uniting in unconditional love. You are meant to join forces with your Twin and contribute the immense power of your soul coming back together as one. This reunification of love lifts our entire planet and paves the way for everyone to remember spiritual truth. It shows the world how to create with love, not fear. This saves humanity so that we can build heaven on earth. Deep down, you know that this is more important than anything.

So let loving service take over when your human challenges overwhelm you. Let arguments be revelations of what longs to heal in yourself. Allow the material fall to the wayside and anything that distracts you from your mission. Leave the judgment of others behind as well as your conditioned beliefs, and move forward to fulfill your purpose. You were born to do this! And your union is making all the difference.

If you are part of a Twin Flame couple, then you are a very advanced being and can truly help our earth. This is what is most important. Honestly, we can’t think of a greater purpose!

You see, you are a spiritual master rediscovering yourself and becoming empowered again. That is why the number one source of guidance to help you through your Twin Flame challenges is your own. Though Twins across the world share very similar experiences, your personal story is uniquely beautiful, and no one can help you through it better than yourself.  So listen to the voice of your own soul, not your ego, above any outside sources – even ours! Nurture this ability in yourself, and watch it bloom.

But, again, we understand how challenging your Twin Flame process is. Rediscovering your Beloved often entails heavenly true love one minute and hellish devastation the next – all with a partner who knows you better than yourself. If this is your experience, then you have come to the right place.

And we want to tell you that the blissful growth we have experienced firsthand is immeasurable. The power of this love is too infinitely joyful to express. Every time we break through our blocks and leap towards each other, we become awestruck by the ecstasy of closeness. And every time we meet other Twin Flames, we become amazed by the similarities we share. It is all real, just as you already know in your heart. This one person is your long lost True Love and Best Friend of all time.

Deep down, you know that you are being guided towards something that few humans have experienced before. The beautiful truth is that your Twin Flame relationship is the ultimate spiritual practice. It sets you on an accelerated path with unprecedented intensity. Your relationship is pushing you to strip away everything in your life that is keeping you from the deepest desires of your soul. It is breaking down your human conditioning and healing anything holding you back so that you can become your ultimate, authentic self.

You are here to unite with your Twin in pure unconditional love, and that is why no conditions are allowed. You must face your unconscious beliefs and clear all of your conditioning. But what do we mean by conditioning? The ways you have been taught to resist love. The ways that you live with unconscious beliefs. Unconscious beliefs sabotage yourself because you feel unworthy.

Your Twin mirrors these limitations back to you. How exactly? Through how you judge them. Yes, that’s right. What you judge your twin for is something in you. It is something that you’ve always judged yourself for. Look deeply at this, and you will see what we mean. Getting rid of your own judgment can be hellish, but just on the other side lies salvation. Once you accept your Twin, you accept yourself and know full unconditional love.

Old coping methods must be addressed. The ways that you are not honoring yourselves will have to be healed because they are keeping you disempowered. These patterns of unhealthiness surface in your relationship with each other (often right before the full moon!) When they do, all fears need to be faced so that you can overcome them. Old patterns can then be released so that you each become whole. In order to do so, you must surrender instead of resisting your own growth.


A Twin Flame relationship is so incredibly challenging in itself. This is compounded when Twins find each other while already in established, precious partnerships and marriages. We understand the guilt and turmoil that is involved because we have been there. We both had to leave the dearest, long-term and committed partnerships, including one with children, in order to be with each other. We have felt the shame and judgment that ensues, that others continue to inflict as we write this.

But hear us when we say that you are allowed to follow your heart. No one has the power to keep you from fulfilling your soul’s most obvious truth – being with your Twin Flame and living your relationship out loud. The unconditional love that calls is meant to be yours. The conditional love of your past – no matter how much you care about and love your former partners – will keep you from following the incredible pull of your heart and soul towards your destiny.

No one can compare to your Twin Flame. If you are following your soul, not your ego, this will become obvious. And you will see that the process of reuniting is serving everyone the exact lessons they need in order to shed their respective conditioning. It is bringing up everyone’s pain that was already their own. Now it has a chance to be healed during these Ascension times. And by overcoming the challenges you face in order to unite, you are being given the exact growth YOU need to be with your Beloved.

IF YOU ARE SEPARATED FROM YOUR TWIN EVEN THOUGH YOU’RE BOTH ON BOARD, DON’T LET THIS STOP YOU FROM GROWING. We understand the total anguish of being apart because we have experienced it many times. If you have to be apart from your Twin, which is always guided, do your own work to make yourself whole. Keep the urgency of getting together alive. It will push you forward. Also make sure that you are working towards living your relationship out loud and aren’t hiding in any way.


Twin Flame relationships seem to require a lot of waiting. But there is a bigger lesson at hand. You are what you are waiting for. The answer is not in your Twin; it is in you. The experience of waiting is asking you to empower yourself, exactly as you are right now, without assistance from your Twin. And until you do, you will continue waiting. Your experience is asking you to honor yourself completely and to actively live NOW from your own place of power. Again, you are being asked to fall back in love with yourself.

You see, only you can rescue yourself from any situation that isn’t honoring you. Because only you tolerate from others what you tolerate from yourself. Time to ask for more and make it happen. No one else can do it for you. That is why you are meant to see the futility in waiting – waiting to walk into the sunset with your Twin. Because you already are everything, and now, not later is your time to shine.


You will start to see that most other relationships in your life have been based on conditional love. This will not only create a lot of pain for you, but total misunderstanding. You will experience many futile attempts to explain unconditional love to these people, and they will try to control you. They will try to guilt you into to sticking with conditional love.

You will also be met with judgment and fear instead of empathy for your situation. For example, you might hear, “How can you talk about unconditional love when you are wrecking a beautiful marriage with children?” At some point, you will have to stop reaching back to others and let them discover unconditional love for themselves. You will have to let people go with compassion until they are ready to see more. This allows you to leap forward and not stay stuck matching their energy. By following your heart to your Twin Flame relationship, you will light the way for others to follow. Those who are meant to continue with you will come back into your life.


Your Twin Flame relationship pulls anything that you have hidden in yourself into the light. Make an effort to cease all hiding in your life whatsoever. End all excuses, defenses, unconscious beliefs and hidden desires. Bring them out into the daylight to flourish, without guilt! You are being asked to live freely, openly, and unconditionally. You are being pushed to purge all guilt, shame, and regrets so that you can fully love yourself as you deserve. Do this for yourself – end the conditioning and limitation of your past, and feel your dreams take flight!


Your other half is your greatest teacher. They teach you by acting as the ultimate mirror of yourself. Your Twin reflects ancient pain within you so that you can finally heal it. Your Twin shows you all the pain that you have carried from experiencing human separation from the Divine. They ask you to shed your separation conditioning and any beliefs that make you feel “not good enough.” Some call this process of purging crucifixion because that is exactly what it feels like.


Thank you for embodying the LOVE. Infinite Blessings,

Suzanne & Spencer


Twin Flame Help © 2015 – 2022.  Unauthorized use and/or duplication of any material on this blog without express and written permission from this blog’s author Suzanne M. Baker and C. S. Cottingham is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Twin Flame Help with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Disclaimer: All of the information on this blog is a sharing of our personal life experiences and is not to be used in place of professional medical help. Twin Flame Help and its authors hold no responsibility for use of the information here within.

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