Evolving back to Love
Life evolves, we evolve. Love evolves with us…
The answers to the deepest questions are oftentimes disarmingly simple. Why are we here? We are here to evolve, to mature, to grow. It’s kind of obvious isn’t it?
What we often struggle to square with our highly developed minds is how short life is and how much there is to know. The answer is that we evolve over many lives. Our soul needs for us to experience the fullest spectrum of experience, and this simply isn’t possible given the brief sojourn that a single life on earth affords. With each new incarnation, our soul takes on a different journey and grows and grows. We carry forward deep lessons born of deep experience into each fresh incarnation.
Our soul evolves in the larger cycles of reincarnation. We evolve within the smaller cycle of our present lifetime. Microcosmic evolution for the evolution of the macrocosm.
Interestingly enough, evolution is most purposeful when there is a lack – when some resource is becoming limited. Fish were driven to transform their fins into limbs and their gills into lungs because the water that was their home receded. They were forced to adapt. Out of limitation came evolution. At this time as humans, we are being forced to adapt to a new stage in our evolution. The waters of limiting old patterns are receding, and those who haul themselves onto the beach of new ideas will evolve dramatically. Sadly, those who choose to remain clinging to the old, limited ways will sink into an ever more competitive world – a shrinking pool of inexorably receding resources.
The wisest teachers demonstrate to us that we must embrace experience fully in the moment in all of its beautiful, crazy and challenging forms. As we evolve, we learn to desist from judging experience through the lens of separation. We grasp the tyranny of dualistic thinking and cease constantly deciding if we like or dislike – if something is good or bad. We begin to see that the limitations we experience are inviting us to evolve.
We also learn to stop pushing. Evolution cannot be forced. Much as we would love to have a step by step programme with guaranteed results at certain stages, life isn’t like that. We can meditate for hours and make time to practice yoga and do pranic breathing techniques till we exhaust ourselves but the goal eludes us because evolution has no goal. Evolution is an infinite divine process that, like time, appears to be streaming from a single point to some kind of place we can get to if we just try hard enough. The truth is Evolution is a process that is driven by the divine which is beyond all conceptions of the mind. It cannot be measured or detected with instruments. It simply is, and it is not trying to get somewhere. It is perfectly growing into infinity.
Humanity is locked into a tremendously convincing belief – the belief that this happened because of that – that time flows in a straight line, and we are incapable of transcending this self-evident phenomenon. But quantum physicists are now demonstrating unequivocally that our whole framework of beliefs – our time-honoured concepts of cause and effect are utterly inaccurate. The belief that our external reality is solid, separate, and unconscious is hopelessly flawed. Belief is proving itself to be inherently limiting.
Reality is infinite and dynamic, conscious and in constant flux. Vibrations appear solid because we believe so resolutely in time as we experience it. Time is merely the experience of perceptions being recognized one after another so that we can know the full spectrum of All That Is. Ask yourself this: If the universe is finite and expanding, what is the universe expanding into?
So we evolve, simple. Evolution is divine love getting to know itself. Evolution is our taking in experience upon experience until we become aware enough to recognize that we know nothing of truth. We evolve to the point where we can see through the veil of duality. And then we are ready to know true love.
True Love has no conception of good or bad. True love embraces all that stands before it and welcomes each experience as an aspect of itself. To love in this way is to love as God loves.
When we are at last open to loving unconditionally, we are ready to reunite with the other half of our soul. And then real growth begins. We no longer seek to decide arbitrarily if we like or dislike our human experience, and so every thought we had previously shunned into the shadow of our psyche – every belief we didn’t know we had – every judgement we laid upon our fellow travellers on the road, is revealed to us in Technicolor, and we sink into a morass of self-recrimination. For now we recognize how stupid we were to settle for the illusion of a separate self, devoid of true purpose and angry as hell.
We lost half of ourselves at the beginning of time and spent lifetime after lifetime believing we were alone, and that we would never know what it is to be whole. But aloneness carries the secret to wholeness. To heal is to become whole. Healing is needed because something is missing – something is amiss. The very word tells us so: alone equals all-one. The answer was always there.
We long for wholeness in ourselves, but as long as we believe we are separate, we cannot heal. Ultimately, we are shooting for unity with the divine, but first we must find our true nature within. We must find unity within our own being before we can reunite with our other half, heal our torn hearts, and continue onwards into divnity.
What I didn’t realize was that to heal is so incredibly painful. I strove to become whole in myself on my spiritual journey, and just as I found a state approaching wholeness – boom! I met my other half. And I was forced to look at every way I had deluded myself that I had dealt with all my stuff.
The other half of my soul is me, and I cannot hide from her. I cannot hide my awareness of missing myself. And so, I was made to face the dark side of my nature that I had chosen to ignore for time immemorial. And that’s rough. My first response was to defend and avoid. I wanted to run away.
Yet Suzanne and I did not run away. We faced each other and we cried. We screamed and we competed. And we dealt with all the crappy traits that have held humanity back, which we denied ourselves we already had. We had to learn to accept ourselves and each other just as we are. And then we began to truly heal.
And now we know that our purpose is to be here for other Twin Flames whom are dealing with such tumult and terror. We love you, and we are here for you always. You ARE ready now. You WILL grow towards each other. You WILL know true love. We all will. That is evolution.
~Spencer
Twin Flame Help 
Quite the best words on this subject read all year. Thanks for this blog
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Truly amazing words I am getting it. Thank you for the best words of wisdom. T
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It’s just thrilling to know some of you are enjoying our writing, thanks so much for leaving such terrific encouragement!
Spencer
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Thank you
Your words helped to make sense of this incredibly powerful amazing yet sometimes frustrating journey I have found myself on, please continue the help it makes such a difference.
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I’m on that beautiful but tremendous pain fulltime path. I reconize a lot you discribe. Thanks for sharing about evolution. I am so gratefull now for évery pain I feel. It’s not the same I look at pain anymore. love you
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I stumbled upon your page and have now read your book. I am in a messy twin flame situation that I could not make sense of. You have unknowingly cast such light and love on my situation that I can confidently say I actually understand why, how, what even if I don’t know when. I know that I need to lead the path of unconditional love which is a concept that had to this day been foreign to me. Thank you.
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Thank you all for being here and your beautiful comments. We are sending support and momentum to each of you. Keep growing so courageously – you truly inspire us! ~Suzanne & Spencer
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Awwww… Your twinship is so cute! And really powerful! Hands down most clear description on a blog. We are really happy to find you. Thanks for being.
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Thank you so much! Just grateful to be of help through the tumultuous and sublime Twin Flame experience ~S&S
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Thank you for writing… for sharing openly and lovingly the truth of your TF journey. I struggle daily to hold love yet keep boundaries with mine… it has been a three year journey, and no end in sight so reading and rereading your blogs (and your book) have helped me stay mindful of my path and purpose, and trust if and when we are to reunite, it will happen in alignment with my work. Please continue to write, it helps so many and I for one am truly grateful for words of wisdom and love!!! You both truly are living your purpose…
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And Thank YOU so very much for sharing your gratitude – we are just thrilled to know our work is resonating and helping in some way. Keep trusting as you are and know we are rooting for you all the way!
Spencer
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Dear Suzanne and Spencer,
I am so grateful I have found you! Thank you for sharing your deeply uplifting messages – they answer all my questions about the difficult situation I’m in right now with my Twin Flame. Every single word I have read here makes such a perfect sense to me! Now I know how to get through the Twin Flame process which I find so painful….thank you.
A.
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We are really touched that we can help. The TF experience is the most dramatic awakening process, vacillating between sheer heaven and utter hell. Blissful heaven does prevail on the other side of immense healing. By healing, we mean shedding human conditioning.
The key is to focus on 5d unconditional love instead of 3d conditional love. This is how the dark nights of suffering end, giving way to highest vibrational experiences.
We send you so much Love and Light as you go through your process. Only TF’s can know just how challenging it is! And we can attest that the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow is beyond your wildest dreams!!! 🌈~S&S
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Dear Suzanne and Spencer,
Please help me….I’m going through hell right now :(. I thought I knew how to get through it but I feel completly lost right now….
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Hi Anna,
Oh how we know the feeling! It is normal to experience this on this advanced Ascension path that all of us are being given the chance to go through.
This is an opportunity for ultimate healing, which means that you are facing all the ways you have not loved your beautiful self because of your human conditioning.
Healing is simply shedding your conditioning. It is not changing, but rather going back to your true state. You are getting all the debris out of the way that keeps you from your true self. We as humans have been trained to hold onto this debris!
The choice is yours to stop attaching to suffering. Get out of the mind and into your all-accepting heart. Your mind will trap you in loops of suffering. Your heart will free you.
Know that you are being guided perfectly on your journey. This is the hardest thing your soul will ever go through, but in the end you will be grateful. In fact, you would do it all over again for what you will gain in your soul – experience in full completion beyond your dreams.
Keep bravely facing your fears and pain. They will dissolve into the illusions they really are. All-accepting Love will triumph ✨
In Loving Support,
S&S
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S&S,
Thank you so much for the support – it means a lot to me and I feel grateful. I am aware that I need to face the pain as this is a part of the proccess – I’m doing my best to accept it, however sometimes I feel like I’m in the middle of a battle between my mind and soul and it hurts so much when the mind is involved…I’m still learning how to get out of the mind and I do trust I’m being guided all the time…
Thank you and have a lovely Christmas.
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Thank you SO much for all of this amazing information. I’ve read what feels like hundreds of websites on this topic and this is the only one that resonates 100%. What the two of you have written makes everything clear as day, nothing has ever made more sense to me. I truly feel enlightened and informed. Super excited to go read your book now! You two are truly a Godsend, you honestly have no idea how much you have helped me. ❤
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Hi Kay!
We are so grateful to receive your message ❤️ and wish you ultimate healing in wholeness.
The Twin Flame relationship is the ultimate and most direct mirror of the self. Twin Flames represent the ultimate example of looking outside for love when the love is already here.
Know how brave you are to be on this most intense and meaningful of journeys. Love ✨~S&S
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Hello and thank you for this website, I’ve read everything and I also read your twin flame book. My question is, though, is there anyway to sever this connection? There are so many days where I want to just throw in the towel and walk away from this whole thing. Like I am just so emotionally exhausted and just want to give up, but my heart and soul won’t let me sever this no matter how hard I try. I’d rather just do all of my inner work on my own WITHOUT having this intense pull towards my twin every minute of everyday. I just don’t see how we can ever be together. There is a large age gap, he is married, I am married and we both have kids with our partners. I’m even finding it hard to be intimate with my husband now because all my heart wants is my twin. It’s agonizing. Is there any way to sever this whole connection? 😦
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Hi Brave Soul! Oh how we know exactly how you feel and what your experience is like. Reading your comment brings it all up again – what we went through to be together, and we offer some thoughts from what we’ve learned.
Yes, you can do the inner work without trying to unite with your Other Half, but you will never do it as fast or as authentically, fully, and completely. The Tf experience pushes you to overcome everything that stands in the way of your freedom. It asks you to heal all shame, guilt, obligation, fear, and human conditioning, and to make your life reflect that on every level. When you heal in such a rapid way – when your life matches the higher place of unconditional love that your Twin is leading you towards, you have also helped to heal all of humanity. That is how huge this experience is. It is the hardest thing your soul will ever go through, but the freedom regained is miraculous.
But to answer your question – yes, you have a choice. You are always in charge, and you can choose what you want. Decide what that is and get all of yourself on board. Being in limbo was for us the hardest part of all. You do not have to heed the call of this LOVE, and you are simply being asked to be true to yourself and to be so for you, no one else.
We are with you and send all our support. Oh how we understand what you are going through, as do so many brave Twin Flames. You are never alone in this,
S&S
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Thank you for taking the time out of your day to write those kind words. The two of you have helped me more than you will ever know… This whole experience is just insane to me. Xo
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Dear Suzanne snd Spencer,
Thank you so much for your latest post about the healing. I saw and read this post minutes after I booked time off away from my reality….and even from my family (husband)…to find myself as recent TF experience pushed me to do something radical in my life….I have never been in such a difficult and painful situation in my whole life….I trust in the healing process and I truly believe I’m on my path to achieve this….
You have mentioned in your post about the rejection and this is exactly what I”ve been through over the last months….it feels like never ending lesson or test which I keep failing…..how can I reunite with myself to find peace as I’m currently emotionally drained…..
X
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Hi Anna,
This time away will be so perfect for you. We want you to pamper yourself completely and treat yourself with so much love and respect. Hug yourself with your own arms, literally! Put your hand on your heart when you feel tested. Ask for guidance from there. You will hear a loving voice or a deep knowing that is extremely loving. Follow that.
It’s interesting to understand that the human experience in general, as well as every relationship we have, provides the same healing process as the Twin Flame relationship, only much slower. (Well, with Ascension, the human experience is now ramping up big time!) So every challenge you have ever had has been trying to strengthen you with more love.
How to reunite with yourself – you are uniting all the parts of you that have not been on your side. The parts that have been in conflict. The parts where you have empathized with others and completely forgot to empathize wit yourself. On this retreat time away, you could simply focus on empathizing with yourself, hearing yourself, validating your own feelings from within, and being completely on your side.
As we say often, you are becoming a sun unto yourself of unconditional love. A whole sun of complete acceptance and strength beyond your dreams!
Please know that you are handling everything to the best of your abilities, and looking back you will see this with such clarity and be so proud of yourself!
All-accepting Love ~S&S
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Thank you so much.
Love.
Anna.
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Hello Anna, has your situation improved? Maybe we can chat.
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And how can a person tell the difference between a twinflame relationship with painful lesson after lesson or if the lesson is to let go and completely leave a painful relationship so that you stop hurting. And how does a person reach this 5D unconditional love? Does it just happen or can you do something? Or are the painful lessons what are doing the healing? I can take the pain, I just don’t know how much of it I should accept.
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All relationships offer mirrors of ourselves. They reflect our own pain, fear, and all that asks to be healed so that we become whole – so that we end the separation in ourselves. Twin Flame relationship offer the most direct mirror of healing. Ascension Soulmate relationships provide contracted healing as well that is more dramatic than our other relationships. The whole point is to get back yourself. And this is imperative right now as Ascension ramps us. It’s an opportunity your soul doesn’t want you to pass up, hence why you have not been able to abandon the process.
All pain comes from feeling separate, unloved, judged, abandoned, betrayed, rejected from something that you are never separate from – LOVE. We ourselves are very upset at how much suffering our journey has entailed. Honestly, the suffering isn’t something we agree with. But we can show a way out of the dark that we found that worked for us – Self-Love.
The way to reach 5D Unconditional Love is through yourself. You start by loving yourself. That is your job.
We wish you all the best on your perfect journey back to wholeness ~S&S
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What I mean is, even if I do love myself and feel whole, and also love a person who does not express any interest in me, even as a friend, when do I know if I should stop pursuing the hope of a relationship? If I should hold onto hope that he “wakes up” or just let the whole belief that he is my twinflame go. Even a psychic told me this person is not the one, but I can’t forget what I felt and thought I just “knew” and all of the information I have read about twinflame runners. I just don’t know how to tell and when to let go of hope. I feel complete and whole, but my life doesn’t feel quite complete.
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I want to be a champion of true love so badly and I want to be reunited. I’m worried I’m spoiled for anyone else. It I don’t know where to go from here when I know that I love my self truely, but yet still want to be in the physical with this person who rejects me. The rejection hurts, but the pain is not about self love. It is because the good moments were so good and I’d like to have that experience while I’m in human form.
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Hi Guys! Thanks so much for your amazingly helpful books and website!
I have a question for you Suzanne..I tried to find your email address so I could message you that way but couldn’t locate it on the website, though I thought I had seen it on here before lol :/. So if you don’t mind I will just ask you here.
You were married with children when you met Spencer correct? I read True Love is Real and fairly certain that that’s what I had read. I wanted to ask you, how was the whole transition? Were you “happily married” when you met Spencer? When did you open up to your husband about finding your twin? I’m married as well, but I now feel like I am just living a lie, so to speak. How long after you and Spencer did you decide it was time to leave your marriage?
I’m sorry if any/all these are too personal, and of course you don’t need to answer them. I just feel so alone and lost through out this journey and really don’t have anyone to talk to about it. It’s hard knowing how to do things the right way. Thank you :).
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Hi there! Suzanne here.
Looking back, it’s obvious that I simply did not resonate with my husband any longer. I had grown so fast on my spiritual journey for many years, and he did not choose to come with me – no judgment. In fact, what’s even more obvious is that there is no judgment whatsoever around these things. Judgment, guilt, and blame are all human forms of control. The more free I felt on my spiritual journey, the more being judged, guilted, and blamed felt so horribly wrong at the deepest level. I was crawling out of my skin to be free. It was the worst kind of prison hell to stay in my marriage, no matter how much I loved and still love my beautiful ex husband who was acting as most humans would.
I loved and still love my ex husband so much at the soul level. Our human journey had been contracted to end, and though I still mourn this, I could no longer be his partner. It is that simple. There was no need for all the drama that ensued except for one purpose – to heal. And I have. So there it is.
I will share also that in the beginning I believed that when Spencer and I got together the stars would align and we would magically unite in a rainbow of golden love. But although certain things did fall into place to help us, we went through our own reunion hell of healing. My family and ex do not know that I was enduring not only the pain from their side, but also even worse from my own Other Half. So I just want to take off the rose colored glasses and share that these healing journeys are intense and relentless, though ultimately worth it a thousand times over. Ultimately, you have the perfect, most harmonious partnership that is like being with yourself but with the ultimate partner. But the key to get there is to get back yourself, do everything for yourself, not for your Twin Flame. Everything that you endure is an opportunity to remember how free and unconditionally loving you already are in your being.
Spencer and I wish you so much healing on your perfect journey.
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All relationships offer mirrors of ourselves. They reflect our own pain, fear, and all that asks to be healed so that we become whole – so that we end the separation in ourselves. Twin Flame relationship offer the most direct mirror of healing. Ascension Soulmate relationships provide contracted healing as well that is more dramatic than our other relationships. The whole point is to get back yourself. And this is imperative right now as Ascension ramps us. It’s an opportunity your soul doesn’t want you to pass up, hence why you have not been able to abandon the process.
All pain comes from feeling separate, unloved, judged, abandoned, betrayed, rejected from something that you are never separate from – LOVE. We ourselves are very upset at how much suffering our journey has entailed. Honestly, the suffering isn’t something we agree with. But we can show a way out of the dark that we found that worked for us – Self-Love.
The way to reach 5D Unconditional Love is through yourself. You start by loving yourself. That is your job.
We wish you all the best on your perfect journey back to wholeness ~S&S
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Dear S&S,
I love reading your posts over and over again and I always find them fascinating and so true.
I’ve been through so much TF related pain lately that I could not take the emotional rollercoaster any more. I felt I needed to release the unbearable pressure because I couldn’t cope with it any longer…..and after I told ny husband about my TF experience….everything’s changed…..I lost physical contact with my TF (he’s run away from me) and my marriage is now falling apart….I feel confused…I don’t know if I still love my husband…
All I know is that I need to find my true Self and let myself heal….but how can I do it without being overwhelmed with all the baggage I’m carrying…?
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Hi Anna,
Our hearts go out to you. It is inevitable on these journeys that you find yourself utterly alone, which feels ironic considering the pull to be with someone else. But these situations are designed this way in order to become whole in yourself.
Try to detach from drama and baggage as much as possible. Find a place of detached, wise compassion whenever you can. It is so easy to get hooked into suffering, especially through the mind or left brain, but you can rise above that through your soul, which sees a much larger perspective. There is so much drama and intensity in our world right now, and there is always much drama in these ultimate partnership scenarios too, but if you can try to disengage from the fight, practice not defending or explaining yourself, and try not to feel inhibited, you will make great progress towards freeing yourself and returning to your soul’s natural state – all while in human form – an incredible feat.
We wish you so much freedom and empowerment on your incredible journey of healing,
S&S
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Hi Yellow Bird,
The questions you ask and the conundrum you face are shared by so many all over the world. There is now an increase in the intensity of these excruciating situations as Ascension ramps up. How we wish that we could answer these questions for you and for everyone, and ease the pain, but that is not in our hands. What we can do is show what worked for us in an ultimate Twin Flame situation.
It is inevitable that in a Twin Flame situation, one cannot control things. One does not get to have the security of a happy ending until all healing is completed, and from our experience, we can say that there seems to be more healing needed than one realizes. These days, it still smacks us in the face when we least expect it. The highs are so high. The occasional lows are so very low.
The number one source of guidance in your situation has got to come from you, not others like us, or psychics. In fact, often you may be presented with challenging information just so you become stronger in yourself. You must become your own source of wisdom delivered directly form your soul. In our opinion, no one can tell you any of the answers to your questions but you. So seek that inner knowing that is wiser than any human thought. If you can’t tap into your own wisdom, then seek ways to increasingly do so on your spiritual journey.
One thing is for sure, we found ourselves utterly alone time and time again with nothing to guide us but ourselves – alone, individually. In the darkest hours of aloneness we grew a strength that is mightier than any human suffering. That is what we gained through our experience. We can survive anything alone and are forever stronger inside. We are whole.
We wish you great personal resolution to your questions and send our heartfelt support,
S&S
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This is so very helpful. Are there exercise to help tap into my own wisdom? All I can think of is meditation.
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And how will we know when we are fully healed? What does it feel like?
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We will share two exercises on the blog under a new page.
We ourselves are not fully healed, but feels close. What it feels like is total unconditional detachment. We feel a higher awareness that keeps expanding further as consciousness opens. Issues no longer trigger but rather present opportunities for detached compassion. We are on everyone’s side and feel unity and presence, and the intensely gorgeous LOVE that we all come from. Our hearts are open and no longer need to close. We feel empowered, invincible and FREE.
S&S
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Thank you so much for your support and wisdom. This is exactly what I’m doing right now – detatching from the painful experiences I’ve been through. I trust my intuition which never lets me down and I’m focusing on my wellbeing. I trust this will help in the process of healing and this is what I desperately need at the moment.
Love,
Anna
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